So. When you've had too much time in your head

There are obvious consequences with checking things off your Bucket List. That cool thing you've always looked forward to is over. It's like coming home from Disneyland on a Sunday with school the next day. That was amazing, but back to real life. And for people like me who don't believe in any sort of afterlife, there is the constant hum in the back of your mind about the futility and meaninglessness of it all. 

Which brings me to a story. So, in the sixties or so, the word "eternity" was springing up all over Sydney in chalk or crayon. Buildings, windows, sidewalks, landmarks... The version of this story I heard said no part of Sydney was immune to the Eternity tagger. No one knew who was writing the word or why, until one day a priest caught a man writing the word in his church. The guy was mentally challenged alcoholic who heard a priest say he wanted to write the word eternity all over the city. The man thought this was a good idea. He was illiterate, but he taught himself how to write that word beautifully and would wake up in the middle of the night, write the word over a different area of town a few hundred times, and then go back to bed. Being chalk and crayon, all the words are gone now aside from the possibility of the one the city decided not to erase inside the bell on top of the old post office. It might still be there, but the irony of writing "eternity" in chalk can't be lost on anyone. 

I don't care if this story is true or not. Do you? 

I am sitting by the water at Karraba Point. It's 22:31 on a Saturday. I'm not lonely. I've established that with myself. It's not loneliness, but there is something else. 

I saw my favorite opera at the Sydney Opera House today. I've walked the Sydney Harbor Bridge a couple of times now. I've hit over twenty countries, four continents. I went skydiving a few days past.  I've lived in Tokyo. I made it into L.V.A., the high school I decided I wanted to go to when I was in elementary school.  Still want to go to Iceland and Egypt, but...  

Distracted from distractions by distractions. 

I don't travel to experience new cultures or make new friends. God. No. It's a stimulant and I new a stronger hit every time now. I have caught myself daydreaming about something bad happening just so I could...level up? 

Maybe tomorrow I'll take a few moments to list out all the things I have done and love about Sydney, but for now, thanks for being a temporary distraction, little phone, from bad thoughts by the water.