"Home" for a few nights. (Dauis, Panglao Island, Philippines)
I'm having a having a hard time with this postcard. Pretty much everything I have done has been documented already. I'm currently on a boat on the way to Oslob along with 21 other fine folks to snorkel with whale sharks. We, Rachel and I, left Boracay on Saturday reluctantly and about seven hours later than we originally planned.
Let's back up and talk about Boracay (ahhhhhh! Dolphins! We just passed a pod of dolphins!) Boracay is, I'm picking up, possibly the biggest tourist destination in the Philippines. This fact terrified me. Visions of Hard Rock Cafes and tour groups holding flags made me a bit reluctant to commit to eight nights. I mean, first of all, eight nights. I never stay anywhere for eight nights unless someone hires me. So, eight nights in possible Aloha Happy Fun Time Tourist Trap Hell? Well, worse comes to worse, I figured, I can build sancastles for a week.
(Ahhhh! Flying fish! Flying fish!!! Ahhhhhh! Awesome! Ahem. As I was.)
Boracay, as it turns out, is an amusement park but with affordable drinks, better food, and no queuing. Our place, a full apartment reserved through AirBnB, was a minute walk to the sand and ninety seconds to the 88 degree water on the "underdeveloped" Third Station of the 4km White Sand Beach. First Station is where the fancy folks stay, Second is for the general Holiday Inn crowd, and Third is pretty much long-term expats. Our building has a relationship with Cowboy Cantina, so Rachel and I ate there at least once a day and the Happy Hour was pretty good so...
Boracay is probably the ideal vacation spot. It's not dirt cheap, but the prices are easy to make for a budget. A beer is a buck and a meal is about $8. Our apartment was $200 for the whole time, and, in the off season (currently), the crowds are not an issue. I don't typically enjoy the whole sit still and relax thing, but our beach was great. Plop on a chair, mooch some free wifi (never did get the wifi at our place to work), and run up a tab as the nice Beer Fairies deliver one frosty San Miguel Light after another. 45 pesos a pop? I got this.
I can really only account for five of the nine days we were there. One day in, one day out, three event days (scuba day, island hopping day, and cliff diving day), so hopefully that alone conveys some idea of how great the beach was and how much "economy I supported."
We arrived to the island just as a typhoon was passing by. The ocean that first day was rough and gray and fun as Hell to bob in. Didn't want to venture out too far, typhoon and unknown beach (rip tides are a thing), but I and a few Aussie expats had fun body surfing.
Rachel and I riding into town on the back of bikes 'cause... Cheap.
Island hopping was a whatever for me but Rachel loved it. Different strokes and all that. For 600 pesos each, we joined one of those big bus tours--but a boat--to check out Crocodile Island (!!!fantastic snorkeling!!!), Crystal Cove (a touristy island I didn't quite understand the point of), and Puka Beach (quiet beach on the far side of Boracay). We were fed, which is always nice, and I got to swim in some cave coves. Not EPIC but nice.
A day was spent at Ariel's Point, which at 2,500 pesos a pop kinda walks the line of being overpriced for what it was. Basically, at 10:40 you arrive at Station One (the opposite side of the beach for Rachel and me). At 11:30, they gather everyone up and start loading them on boats. Because some people are ridiculous, this takes almost 30 minutes. You leave at noon, arrive around 1, spend an hour encouraging and being encouraged into cliff diving, eat lunch, end up either snorkeling or water kayaking for awhile, and then are rounded up by 4. Yeah, food is free, it's all you can drink, and transport is included, but how much do you really wanna drink when jumping 10, 15, 20, or 25 feet? (Or 50. Some bastard did the 50 while I was snorkeling. I am going to be pissed forever that I was out done.)
The other major activity for me was I finally tried Scuba. Unless you get to check out a wreck or go into a cave, I don't really get it. After the training video, quiz, medical interview (where I lied, lied, lied. "Do you have any history of sinusitis? Do you have any history of ear problems including frequent ear infections? Any lung disorders including asthma?"), and the inland fiddling with equipment, I was taken to the beach to practice certain techniques like clearing the respirator, the mask without coming up, different ways to control depth... It was great because I had the instructor all to myself and, alas, I did freak out at one point.
Here's the thing. I'm pretty okay I'm water. Not good. But okay. I can swim and float and tread. Holding my breath, using a device to breathe, whatever. What freaked me out was I couldn't see behind me. I have issues with my back being exposed or not having constant awareness of what's behind me. At one point I KNEW there were swimmers behind me but my instructor (a rather attractive man from France with the accent and the look 80% of the world would have dirty thoughts about) kept holding me in a way I couldn't see them. First of all, I was having touch issues and then the exposed back thing freaked me out. When he tried to get me to do the thing where you drop and need to retrieve your respirator without coming up... I had to hand signal him to stop. Wait. Gimme a minute here. I didn't quite having my head together and tried to do the exercise quickly, but as it turns out, fighting off a mini panic attack underwater means you probably don't have a big enough breath, and for a moment there, as I tried to fake having my shit together, I considered giving the whole thing up as a bad idea. Managed to pass inspection, I guess, and then we boarded a boat to a reef where I had a slightly better view then I would have with a snorkel but now I had the added joy of someone touching me every few moments, fears of compression-related side effects drilled into me, a natural fear/respect for damaging the coral, and being judged the entire time on how I was breathing. I dunno. I did it. I like snorkeling more. Sure, you get closer to the fish and stuff, but for the most part space between you and what's down there is better for both sides and, those moments when you do want a closer look, you can just take a breath and free dive.
Saw a lion fish, though, and a bunch of different eels. That was cool.
Scuba diving, sky diving, cliff diving... I guess I've done a bunch of the "diving" activities.
While the beaten path is something I am supposed to snub my nose at, and I do a lot, a lot of times the beaten path is like that because it's great. Wanna be alone? Boracay. Wanna hang out with people? Boracay? Wanna go to TGI Fridays? Boracay. Wanna go to a small, thatched roof bar with no floor directly on the beach? Boracay. Wanna go home with a stranger 'cause he has a better place than you? Boracay.
Wait. What?
Wanna get drunk and piss off a whole bar full of Aussies by kicking their ass at a pub quiz while being all, "oh, hey! I know the answer! Woot! America!" Boracay! No seriously. Rachel and I came in second to another American guy who got bonus points for playing alone. Won 400 pesos!
(Whale shark experience, finished!)
So now we are down in Bohol. We pretty much only came here because of the whale sharks. Now, I had some reservations about this whale shark thing. Just like the elephant experiences in Thailand or whatever, I know that a lot of these animal interactions aren't exactly good for the animals. At this place in Oslob, they feed the sharks and we were in a netted-off area in the ocean. I am curious about the legalities and logistics of holding these guys in a pen. How long are they kept there? Who is benefiting from the insane amount of money the hordes of tourists are bringing in? I knew the sharks were being fed but the nets were a surprise. I dunno. Old joke continues to hold true. Everything I enjoy in life is immoral, illegal, or fattening.
Two days left in the Philippines. Let's see if we can find some thing that is all three at once.
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